From the album Stanley The Walrus

The song that started it all.

Lyrics

There once was a walrus named Stanley
He thought of himself as very manly
And was known by everyone in town.
He was lacking in hygiene, his tusks were part yellow and part green
His breath was so bad it could almost knock you down.
And they said if you want to get up close to us
Brush your tusks
There once was a walrus named Stella
She was looking for a fella
That’s when Stanley happened to saunter by
She smelled him before she saw him
And tried really hard to avoid him
But Stella had already caught Stanley’s eye
And she said if you want a future for us.
Brush your tusks
Well Stanley really loved Stella
And he wanted to be her fella
So he came up with an extraordinary plan
He got himself to the city and the carwash people had pity
They washed him clean of all his dirt and rust.
And just before he left to go back home
They brushed his tusks
Stanley and Stella got married that afternoon
They went to Hawaii for their honeymoon
Their marriage is built on honor love and trust
And before they settle in each night
They brush their tusks
So if we can learn from Stanley
Good hygiene comes in handy
When you’re trying to win the apple of your eye
If you’re seeking relations and you have some high expectations
Why not give cleanliness a try
Because in the game of Love this is a must
Brush you tusks
Comb your hair
Have a bath
Wear clean underwear.
Brush you tusks